Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
God I need to hump something, right now.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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