At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
In America we eat man semen.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
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