you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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