Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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