If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
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