Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
