I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
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