WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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