i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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