the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
