I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
