guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
