it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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