Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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