ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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