Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
how does that bad decision feel?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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