Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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