I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Randomize
