Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
vagina is talking i cant
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
