i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
We need to get me chipped asap
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
