Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
