Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
