We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize