And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
