I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
