ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize