The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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