6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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