Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
