So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize