sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
