We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
