Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
