You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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