Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
