We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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