so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
