i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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