This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
