So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Just pee around me
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
