so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
