i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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