Joe is yelling at the trees again.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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