I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
40s are totally the cure
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Randomize
