I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
