apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
