"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
