Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
high people should be assigned attendants
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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