I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Randomize
