I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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