He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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