Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
